4.05.2008

Intervention

This past Tuesday, my sister and I had a mini-intervention for our dad. He is an alcoholic. He has been for so long that I don't even remember when it started. I have some great memories of my dad. He was my little league softball coach. We played catch in the backyard almost daily in the summer. I also have some memories that I wish would disappear.

The actual "intervention" went pretty well. We did it because we love him, we care about him, and we are worried about him. Obviously he tried to change the subject, blame his drinking on other things, talk about the past, etc. He also was very emotional, and it was obvious that he recognizes that he has a problem. This was encouraging. However, he would not agree to do anything about it other than go to the doctor for a physical. He hasn't had one in years and I thought that would be at least a start. Get him into a doctor, see how everything is ticking, maybe the doctor can give him suggestions, make some referrals. We made it clear that we are there for him if he wants us to go along to meetings, or for anything else he might need. I also made it clear that if he doesn't choose to get help, he will no longer be a part of mine, my husbands, or Fuzz's lives.

Sadly, this doesn't seem to have impacted him like I thought it would. It was only after I told him that that he agreed to go to the doctor for a physical. He is still drinking heavily, going out to bars, driving home. I hate it.

I just talked to him tonight and he still isn't willing to go to a meeting or see a counselor to get to the root of the problem. I am done calling him. Next time he calls me, I will ask him if he's been to a meeting, if he's drank recently. If he hasn't been to a meeting and if he's still drinking, I'm telling him not to call until he's been to a meeting and has been sober for a week. I refuse to let my daughter grow up around that. His behaviors are not ok, and I will not allow him to believe that I think they are by remaining in his life.

His drinking has been a problem for a long time, I finally feel like I'm doing something about it. He chooses his consequences, but I am not letting it be the unspoken "secret" anymore. I wish My Love was here...


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