I love food

Another great thing about having Stryker home is that I am cooking for more than myself and an occasional guest. It's great. I've been able to try several new recipes, and most of them have been wonderful.

I've been really into making homemade bread lately. I'm not sure why, but I love it! I've tried a couple different recipes for french bread. I've found a really great recipe for pizza dough (seriously, it's d.e.l.e.c.t.a.b.l.e). Homemade cinnamon rolls anyone? Best I've ever made. Even better than the ones out of the can.

My mom gave me an awesome recipe for banana bread with an orange glaze on top. It sounds like a weird combo but it's the best banana bread I've ever had, and I already had a great banana bread recipe. I've also tried an applesauce bread with a cream cheese filling that I found on this website. It was good but very spice-y. Very Thanksgiving/Christmas. I'd cut back on the nutmeg next time. This is what it looked like:



We've tried great seafood recipes like ginger-glazed mahi-mahi, and awesome grilled recipes like a southwest turkey breast with avocado salsa. Italian, Mexican, American....you name it. The best part is that we have so many more to try!

Alright, I'm hungry...gotta go.

Ugly

Although I have tons of other pictures I could post, I figured maybe words would be nice for a change. There have just been so many photographic moments lately that I haven't been able to resist.

Fuzz acts as if Daddy has always been around. I, however, am not so quick to forget what life was like before redeployment. It's very strange. Pre-Fuzz, reintegration was a snap. Post-Fuzz, not so much. It's frustrating to me.

I am completely grateful and blessed that Stryker is finally back home with us. It's wonderful having him here. The house stays cleaner, I'm not drop dead exhausted by the end of the day, Fuzz has a mommy and a daddy to pay attention to her throughout the day, etc. etc. There are so many benefits to having him home.

I spent 15 months wishing he was here. I longed for his touch, I wished that those "Mwa!"s at the end of every conversation were real, I couldn't wait to feel his skin against mine. So how messed up is it that now that it's finally real, those touches and kisses I so longed for sometimes cause irritation?

I'm not used to being touched and kissed so much throughout the day. When he was gone, I had to adapt to not having those things, and now that they are reality again, I need to adapt back. I guess I'm not quite there yet, but it is getting better daily. We talked about it the other night, and since then I haven't been stressing about it so much, and things have been much better.

I love my husband, and it's hard for me to accept that this is normal, even though I know it is. I know we'll get there, I just wish it didn't take so darned long.

Day Two

On day two, Fuzz turned 18 months old! We spent the morning running errands, and the rest of the day was spent playing. They are still trying to catch up on all that play and tickle time.

Just a part of the package

Wow, you guys rock! Thanks for all the well wishes on Stryker being home. We've read every single one. I think he finally understands the support you have all given me throughout this deployment.

Yesterday, I spent the afternoon in bliss at the spa in the fancy resort up at the north shore. It was, according to Stryker, my Valentine's Day/you never got time to yourself and you deserve it, gift. I have to say, I wasn't feeling all that worthy. I just considered going through this deployment a part of our life together. Not fun, but necessary if I want to continue to be with, and love, Stryker. He and our relationship, is more than worth it.

I told him after I got back my feelings about it. He took my hand, pulled me out of the chair, and started dancing with me right in the living room, as he started rattling off all the reasons why he thought I did in fact deserve it. No wonder why I missed him so much! It's easy to forget all those little romantic things they do everyday when they have been gone for so long.

We are not really having any of those reintegration problems that we did during R&R. I think we must have worked the bugs out at that time, and now it's smooth sailing. Fuzz is getting better with the change every day. I mentioned how hard of a time we were having at bedtime and naptime, and as of yesterday, she's going down without fighting it again. Loving it.

You mean it's real?

Finally, two days after Stryker got home it is beginning to feel like it's real. I felt like after 15 months of separation, the little ceremony (although exciting) just didn't do the whole deployment justice. Where was the parade, the confetti, the champagne spraying all over?

It's only occasional moments that I realize that he's not on borrowed time. I don't have to give him wholly to lady Army in two weeks. It's still hard to wrap my head around.

Fuzz is adjusting, but not as quickly as she did on R&R. Yesterday she fought naptime and bedtime like you wouldn't believe. This is a big adjustment for her. She's not used to sharing me. But it is cute, when Stryker kisses me she trots right over and watches and smiles. Cutest thing.

I am so relieved he's home. I'm incredibly blessed to be so in love.

15 months

He's home...he's finally home.

15 months in which we both grew as individuals. 15 months in which we went through things alone that we wish we never would have, but made us stronger. 15 months of our lives, over.

What I've been doing today...

And trying my hardest not to do this to Fuzz...

That girl was up at 6AM and would not go back to sleep. So she's been clingy and whiney all day. I just laid her down for a nap and she's fighting that as well. If you remember from a previous post, she has radar when something big is happening.

Hmm...I wonder what that "something big" could be?

Not so typical

*UPDATE* It's true, I talked to him this morning!!!

Seeing as how it's Saturday and on the weekends TV is crap and no one blogs much, I am bored and therefore incessantly checking the division website for updates. Updates that I know won't be there because they don't really update until they actually are on their flight back.

So imagine my surprise when I note that both, both "tentative" chalks that Stryker "could, maybe" be on have been bumped up by a day. Yes, you read that correctly. Bumped up, not back.

If that isn't unarmyish, I don't know what is.

What is armyish is that after the initial flutters in my belly of excitement, my brain told me to hold on and not get so excited. See...they don't just train our husbands, they train us too.